人物描写——动词
“向前！向前！向前！我们的队伍向太阳，脚踏着祖国的大地，背负着民族的希望，我们是一只不可战胜的力量！” 这首军歌传唱八十余年，每每旋律响起，依旧铿锵有力，震撼人心！
今天，我们一起致敬最可爱的人！
战士们迈步强壮有力，手握枪支坚定果敢。那整齐划一的动作无疑凝聚着整个民族的力量。
那么，如何用文字达到刻画人物，展现人物张力的效果呢？
今天，就让我们来学习曹雪芹先生是如何通过动作描写来刻画人物的吧。
动作描写
由于我国古典小说源于民间艺人讲史说书的口头创作，因此它在表现手法上有个传统的特点：善于描写“动”。《红楼梦》继承了我国古典小说传统的艺术手法，它力求通过人物自身的语言行动，把人物隐蔽、微妙、复杂的感情活现出来。
01
曹雪芹在《红楼梦》中经常使用准确、精炼的词语
“抓拍”人物的瞬间动作，堪比照相机，以达到刻画人物性格的目的。
第四十四回选句
“为贾琏放风的小丫头一见了风姐，缩头就跑。”
杨译
...but at sight of them she turned and ran.
霍译
...who, as soon as she caught sight of them, turned tail and ran.
曹雪芹用一个“缩”字写出了身为下人的小丫头对刁酸泼辣的主子王熙风的畏惧，写出了小丫头因秉性善良而为自己迫不得已所做的事的内疚心情，写出了因生活在贾家豪宅而无法掌握自己命运的小人物的强烈的自我保护意识。如果把“缩”字改为“扭”字、“转”字或“掉”字，该句话都不会有这么多涵义。
对比以上两个译文，似乎霍译的文字稍稍生动一点，他因为用了 "turned tail" ,而增强了译文语言的文学效果。
02
曹雪芹常通过描写人物的连续动作刻画人物，通过这种动中写静的艺术手法，曹雪芹使自己笔下的人物栩栩如生，充满个性。
第十八回选段
当黛玉听说众小厮把宝玉所佩之物都拿去之后，将信将疑地去核实此事，出现了一段关于黛玉赌气剪荷包的精彩描述。
当黛玉听说众小厮把宝玉所佩之物都拿去之后，将信将疑地去核实此事，出现了一段关于黛玉赌气剪荷包的精彩描述。
（原文及翻译较长，请二者适当滑动观看）
向上滑动阅览
林黛玉听说，走来瞧瞧，果然一件无存，因向宝玉道：“我给的那个荷包也给他们了?你明儿再想我的东西，可不能够了!” 说毕，赌气回房，将前日宝玉所烦他作的那个香袋儿—才做了一半—赌气拿过来就铰。宝玉见他生气,便知不妥,忙赶过来,早剪破了。宝玉已见过这香囊,虽尚未完,却十分精巧，费了许多工夫。今见无故剪了，却也可气。因忙把衣领解了，从里面红袄襟上将黛玉所给的那荷包解了下来，递与黛玉瞧道:“你瞧瞧，这是什么!我那一回把你的东西给人了?” 林黛玉见他如此珍重,带在里面，可知是怕人拿去之意，因此又自悔莽撞,未见皂白，就剪了香袋。因此又愧又气，低头一言不发。宝玉道:“你也不用铰。我知道你是懒待给我东西。我连这荷包奉还，何如?”说着，掷向他怀中便走。黛玉见如此，越发气起来，声咽气堵，又汪汪的滚下泪来。拿起荷包来又剪。宝玉见他如此,忙回身抢住,笑道:“好妹妹，饶了他罢!”
向上滑动阅览
杨译：
“So you ve given them that pouch I made you too!” she remarked. “All right, that's the last thing you'll ever get from me.” Going crossly back to her own room, she took her scissors and started cutting up the sachet she had been making for him at Baoyu’s own request.
Baoyu, seeing that she was angry, knew that something was up and hurried after her. Too late. Although the sachet had not been finished, the embroidery on it was very fine and she had put a lot of work into it, so he was annoyed to see it spoilt for no reason. Quickly undoing his collar, he pulled out the pouch he was wearing over his red tunic.
“Look, what's this?” he asked, showing it to her. “When have I ever given anything of yours to someone else?”
Realizing that he treasured her gift so much that he had kept it safely hidden away, Daiyu repented of her hastiness and hung her head in silence.
“You didn't have to cut it up,” went on Baoyu reproachfully. “I know you don't like giving me anything, so I'll let you have this one back too, how about that ?” Tossing it into her lap, he turned to go.
Choking with anger Daiyu burst into tears. She picked up the pouch meaning to cut it to pieces as well. But he rushed back to stop her, begging, “Dear cousin, spare it!”
霍译：
‘so you’ve given away that little purse I gave you? Very well, then. You needn't expect me to give you anything in the future, however much you want it!’
With these words she went off to her own room in a temper, and taking up a still unfinished perfume sachet which she was making for him at his own request, she began to cut it up with her embroidery scissors. Bao-yu, observing that she was angry, had hurried after her — but it was too late. The sachet was already cut to pieces.
Although it had not been finished, Bao-yu could see that the embroidery was very fine, and it made him angry to think of the hours and hours of work so wantonly destroyed. Tearing open his collar he took out the little embroidered purse which had all along been hanging round his neck and held it out for her to see.
‘Look! what’s that? when have T ever given anything of yours to sommeone else?’
Dai-yu knew that he must have treasured her gift to have worn it inside his clothing where there was no risk of its being taken from him. She regretted her over-hasty destruction of the sachet and hung her head in silence.
‘You needn’t have cut it up,’ said Baoyu. ‘I know it’s only because you hate giving things away. Here,you can have this back too since you are so stingy!’
He tossed the purse into her lap and turned to go. Daiyu burst into tears of rage, and picking up the little purse, attacked that too with her scissors. Baoyu hurried back and caught her by wrist.
‘Come, cuzzy dear!’ he said with a laugh. ‘Have mercy on it!’
选段赏析
下面我们将讨论杨和霍对“饺”、“剪”、“解”、“递”、“掷”、“抢”等几个动词的翻译。翻译时，译者首先应该注意到原文作者为了突出作品中男女主人公之间的冲突，在短短的几百字中先后重复使用了四次“剪”，两次使用“剪”的同义词“铰”。
剪、铰
翻译“饺”和“剪”时，杨两次译为“cut up”，一次译为“cut it to pieces”，一次译为“spoilt”，两次省略不译。霍两次用“cut up”一次用“cut to pieccs”,一次用“attack”,一次用“destroyed”，一次省略不译。
杨译和霍译对“cut”的反复使用从某种意义上来讲就再现了原文“铰”、“剪”的反复使用的文体特征，或者说与原文的文体特征巧合。翻译以上这个例子时，也许可以考虑用“cut up"译“饺”，用“snip"或其他词译“剪”并且将其重复使用。
详情请见往期推送《那个香囊还在吗？》
戳蓝字跳转～
解 递 掷 抢
解：
（杨） quickly undoing tearing open
（霍） tearing open
递：
（杨） showing
（霍） held it out
掷：
（杨） tossing
（霍） tossed
抢：
（杨） rushed back to stop her
（霍) hurried back and caught her by the wrist
为了准确的通过人物的动作来揭示人物的内心情感，译者应该精心挑选描写人物动作的词汇。
例如，
翻译 “解” 时，用"tear"就比"undo"更能揭示宝天当时的心情，杨宪益翻译时加了"quickly"就是为了描述宝玉当时在气头上的行为动作，但是如果能通过动词本身来描写，文学效果则更佳。
翻译 “递” 时，似乎用"hold it out"或"present it in front of her"比用"show"更能表现宝玉对黛玉的真诚。
翻译“掷”时，杨、霍都使用了"toss"，如果用"drop"或"throw"语气会更重一些，更有益于描述宝玉当时的行为，刻画宝玉当时的心态。
翻译“抢”时，杨和霍都没有采取直译。霍将“抢”译为"hurried back and caught her by the wrist",杨将“抢”译为"rushed back to stop her",这 "caught her by the wrist"比"stop"更生动、更有文学色彩。
词汇总结
sachet
n. 小袋；香囊
embroidery
n. 刺绣; 刺绣品
toss
1. n. 投掷；摇荡；投掷的距离；掷币赌胜负
2. vt. 投掷；使…不安；突然抬起；使…上下摇动；与…掷币打赌
3. vi. 被乱扔；颠簸；辗转；掷钱币决定某事